Damon and I were walking down a sidewalk to dinner, both pushing a stroller. He didn’t have to say much, only “whoa”. I suddenly saw us from the perspective he had, from the outside, watching us. Dads.
So this is where we are. Damon married my sister four years ago, the same summer I married Jordin. I look at Kinsey, their 10 month old, and I look at the little boy sleeping in my lap right now with no words. I only wonder how the two of them will interact. I loved growing up with my cousins, riding the tractor at their cottage and performing entire Disney movie musicals on the kitchen counter, next to a board of Chinese checkers. The counter was our stage. Rachel was always the director. Jordin and I will be shooting her wedding next month.
There isn’t a specific word I have found to identify this strange feeling of reverse nostalgia. Longing, blissful thoughts not of the past, but of now and the future. We are now the parents in our own childhood memories. I am the uncle. There is a new story beginning, and we have all switched parts.
I am so thankful.
Some more of Casen and his mommy, from the last few weeks of his existence.